Shikaku's First Failure
by uselessfanficwriter
Summary: In which Shikaku attempts to unravel the blond jinchuuriki, only to be met with failure.
1. Shikaku's perspective

Naruto was an enigma to those around him, and the jounin commander of konoha was no exception. For most of his childhood an image or rather facade of a happy go lucky teen had been built up and displayed to the public but upon stumbling across the blonde things seemed drastically different

Shikaku Nara was an observant person, being a veteran he could pick apart a shinobi in seconds dissecting their personality and work traits. But when he was presented with the Uzumaki he found himself baffled.

One day the child would have a smile on his face, but on another there would be a shadow casted on his face and a smell of sake lingering on his breath. But as far as he knew the blonde was not a drinker . In fact not many genin were, being unaware of the fact that being a ninja ultimately makes you an adult in the eyes of the law.

He kept an eye on him since then, tried to convince himself that it was to appease the worries that the kyuubi could affecting the child's mental health or because he was a friend of his son.But at the end of the day he could not deny he merely wanted to sate his curiosity on how a child kept such an addiction hidden in plain sight.

Through the course of a few weeks in which he kept his eyes on the whiskered teen when he was in his presence, he next found him in the corner of a bar. In front of him a bottle of wine, and a glass in his hands which was slowly being twirled around with the movement of his wrist.

He watched intrigued, subtly notifying Inoichi of the boy, however the response he had received threw him off balance.

"He comes here time to time, strangely I think I've seen him with Anko."

Anko. What the hell would the snake mistress want with that brat? But then again he mused, it was one village pariah to another, with their senses dulled with alcohol, they became easy pillars of strength and understanding.

But now he had another question swirling his head, just how many people knew?

He knew by now judging by his old teammates raised eyebrows that he needed an excuse for his interest, and simply blurted out that he should know the state of a shinobi that could be under his command if he ever got a promotion. It was bullshit really, but no one questions his words simply because of who he was.

He silently began to plan. By putting the boy in an event where he was surrounded by friends and most importantly alcohol, would he give into the temptation? With it being only a few months before the chuunin exams and the rookies being aware, he could have Yoshino plan a party under the guise of wishing them well.

But setting this plan into motion was tricky, even more so that he had to get his troublesome wife to agree.

 _What a drag._

Two weeks later, Shikaku found himself seated amongst his fellow clan heads. Tricking Yoshino had been easier than expected, the matriarch had been ecstatic that her husband was getting off his ass for once, completly unaware of his hidden intentions.

On table only a few meters a head sat the 9 graduates accompanied by Gai's team. His plan would set into play when food would be served and the following events would play out from then on.

He waited silently for everyone to be seated around the new table that had been arranged, purposely putting everyone on the same table, but most importantly himself next to Naruto.

As the Akimichi chef, who had diligently cooked the food to impress, placed the food down onto the table a small chatter began amongst the guest. Looking ahead of him was his son, who like his father would have, was dozing off completely blocking out the events around him. Better that than him pay attention, another objective of his was to be discreet or else he would end up scaring the kid off.

As the adults conversed about mundane topics, he motioned to the working staff to bring out bottles of sake, and watched as one was placed in front of each of the guests.

Including the genin.

"We can't drink this!"

Ino's exclamation caused a chuckle to escape from his throat.

"Of course you can, genin are considered adults, surely you knew that?"

It was amusing to see their eyes widened to the point it looked comical. He noted that even after being informed the genin pushed away the bottles, noses wrinkling in disgust. He could hear the excuses flying across the room, ranging from Kiba complaining about the bad smell or Sakura claiming that it was unladylike. But his eyes were focused solely on the next to him.

Blue eyes flickered occasionally to the bottle but seemed to dismiss his train of thoughts and resumed eating, taking sips of water in between, a look of dissatisfaction on his face which disappeared just as quickly as it had come.

The boy was cautious, that was easy enough to see, had enough self restraint to keep himself from indulging in front of his friends. But it begged the reason as to why? If he knew of the law concerning drinking and allowed himself to then what was there to hide?

He had arrived with a plan but left with failure.

 _Mendōkusai_


	2. Naruto's mind, Shikaku's mystery

Growing up in the slums of Konoha, Naruto had found himself deprived of the childish innocence that his fellow classmates possessed.

Instead of clan members, streets thriving with intelligent shinobi and the likes, there were brothels and cunning men waiting to rob him of his little wealth. As much as he tried, the Sandaime Hokage could only do so much for an orphan who supposedly had no special bloodline or ability.

This particular disadvantage was how Naruto ended uo the way he was. With no emotional suppourt, the blonde jinchuuriki had to find other outlets for his emotional baggage.

 _Which so happened to be alcohol._

A feeling of bitter resentment crept into his viens as he remembered the day in which he stumbled across his faithful poison, an unhealthy dependance he would never escape from one that had been born from years of pain and suffering.

 _A childhood which set a barrier in place that he would never know how to breach._

 _And hidden from view was the insight that Shikaku needed but lacked._

His classmates may have learned to read or write their names with playful rhymes and easy smiles, but Naruto learned the hard way, through blood and hardship as he gave each letter a meaning to form its existence.

He started of with N.

N for numb, because after awhile he couldn't feel anymore. Every time their hands would grasp tightly at his wrists or when their weapons dug deep into his skin with eyes that burned with hatred, he could not feel. Would not. Because demons didn't deserve to do so.

A for agony, an emotion he felt so often, whenever the villagers hands struck his skin or when the children flinched and ran away. He felt agony deep within his bones, a dull pain he would never be able to escape.

R for the resistance he knew was futile. No matter how deeply he craved to be free from the chains holding him back, how much he craved for the freedom of being set free from the kyuubi's shadow that encased him, he knew he never would. He was konoha's jinchuuriki, from the day he was born till the day he died.

U for unpredictable. He chose to hide any intelligence from their prying eyes, and became Konoha's most unpredictable ninja who went into a fight head first, no plans and survived out of sheer luck. He was unpredictable because no one would bother to look underneath the underneath and see the cunning mind that lay behind the mask.

T for torture. Distantly he can remember each and every time his hands were bound, rope digging into tan arms tearing apart the skin beneath. All the times he was cut and healed again only to relive the pain once more. Over and over again.

O for oblivion. Naruto wants to fade into oblivion, a state of unawareness where he doesn't have to deal with all the complete and utter bullshit thrown his way. His only way to do so is by drinking, glass after glass so his mind becomes a haze and his thoughts a drunken mess. .

He was not Uzumaki Naruto who shouted at the top of his lungs of how he would become Hokage, not the kid who had no talent or passed because of circumstance.

No, he was Naruto.

 _Who loved them enough to give himself up, enough to become an empty shell, granting their wishes for their happiness, to be a distant memory as they grew and advanced._

 _Without him._


End file.
